A Bogus Anti-Joint Custody
Argument?
No, they really mean it!
By Stuart Miller
One of the most offensive arguments against presumptive
joint-custody is the proposition that fathers only want
joint-custody so they can reduce their child support payments.
Naturally, this mean-spirited argument assaults the very nature
and soul of all men... and fathers in particular.
Such a vicious argument portrays fathers as shallow, selfish,
un-loving, uncaring scum who really care more about a couple of
lousy bucks than their "insincere" protestations that
they "love their own children" seem to indicate. The
unspoken thought: "we all know that fathers don't really
love their children, don't we?" is implicit every time the
argument is raised.
But, what the joint-custody opponents don't seem to realize, is
that when they raise this argument they expose something very
revealing about themselves.
You see, the theory behind child support is that the
non-custodial-parent (NCP) is not supporting the child and
therefore the custodial parent (CP) must do so, justifying
transfer of the NCP's funds to the CP, for that purpose. Because
of this theory, most states base their child support guidelines
on "zero" direct-support from the NCP.
Where there is joint custody, the NCP is spending money
directly on the child, that the CP would be spending on the child
if the NCP were not doing so. Therefore the support amount paid
is the same, the support is being spent directly on the child. It
is just the need to transfer the funds that then becomes
unnecessary.
Most joint-custody parents spend more than any offset they may
get through reduced child support payments. Keep in mind, we are
talking about reduced child support transfer payments, not
reduced child support. The only way that one parent can possibly
gain an advantage and reciprocally, that the other parent lose,
is if the child support guidelines contain a profit for
possession of the child and are not solely based on the cost of
supporting the child.
If the profit-factor is true, as the opponents of joint-custody
are inadvertently alluding, then the child support guidelines are
illegal, morally bankrupt and unconstitutional. They would amount
to nothing more than legalized extortion! Worse, it would be one
of the most heinous forms of extortion... holding one's child for
ransom without providing any hope of ever allowing them to be
meaningfully reunited with each other.
Yes, the next time someone says "fathers only want custody
to reduce their child support payments," bear in mind what
they are really saying is "I believe I am making a cash
profit from a gravely immoral act... and I want to continue to do
so."
In psychological terms, this is called "Projection."
Projection is where someone projects their own noxious qualities
on someone else, then despises the recipient for now possessing
those noxious qualities, and sees themselves as totally blameless
in their own eyes.
To sum it up, "fathers only want joint-custody to reduce
their child support," really means "I am a selfish,
immoral person who would rather make a profit on my child than
allow the child to have a meaningful relationship with his or her
father." It's that simple.
Prepared for the web, 25 March 1999